Tuesday, September 25, 2012

ten reasons // 2

Top 10 Reasons For A Positive Outlook 

even though you feel shitty both physically and emotionally, and would rather give everyone the finger than slog through another 90+ minute meeting of the mindless

(by the way, don't you just love the word "slog"?!?)

By Yoga Bear
  1. There's a 99.999999999814% chance that whatever ails you will pass within a few days, and with some tomato soup and some NyQuil, you'll be good as good tomorrow, unless you get wasted again tonight, in which case... Kudos.
  2. Pretty sure your sick days have you looking better than my good days, for sure at least since I've gone fu manchu-style in this bitch.
  3. Speaking of crazy, your hair is crazy awesome. And you can rock a backwards ball cap, mega points on that.
  4. You have a plush corporate baller job that when your company jumps off and becomes like bazillionairish you will be in a great position to rake in benjamins.
  5. You will be like the only person to receive two top ten lists from me in a two-week span. Lauren = privileged. 
  6. Our favorite teams play this weekend. At the very least, you can take solace in the fact that I will be happy when my Eagles shut out the Giants 97-0.
  7. It begs mentioning again that you are a really kickass writer and have distinct talent. I remember that poem (or whatever would be the literary equivalent) you wrote of that time we hung out in the park/Kings Point chapel. Seriously, go submit some essays-poems-screenplays to a publisher sometime because your shit is off the hook.
  8. You like to work on motorcycles.
  9. I'm home in like a week so if you are down you can totally call me and bitch about life and I will totally pretend to be interested ;) haha for real though I've been told my voice has calming effects (word would not tell me whether A or E ffects was the proper choice).
  10. Come on you should totally be happy because you Lauren Fucking McK, aka laurentheanimal, which again, awesome. You are cool. Tubular. Rad. Cowabunga. Insert other ninja turtle favorite adjective. And just like Michelangelo, you're a party dudess. So get some semicolon capital D action up in here. Please. 

:D :D :D

I'm loving this twist on my old Ten on Tuesday posts :)


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